If you are trying desperately to get your ex back it's important to understand that the emotional pain you are experiencing right now could keep you from thinking clearly. It's time to step back and take a good look at how you have been handling the situation so far. Many people keep blundering along making things worse so you may not even see that your actions might actually be pushing your ex even further away instead of increasing your chances that you will get your ex back. Something seems to happen to people who feel like they have lost someone or something they desperately want to get back, they allow their emotions to take over and don't realize that desperation sets in. Soon you are exhibiting the push away behaviors that make it much harder to get your ex to come back to you.
When you beg or plead with your ex to come back it only drives them further and further away. You may think that if they only knew how much you love them and need them, they will finally get it and come rushing back into your waiting arms. Not likely - you may find them rushing into the waiting arms of someone else instead! You need to regain your dignity here. Just think of all the classic movie scenes where you watched the ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend character desperately trying to win their lover back with needy declarations of undying love, or convince the ex of their attempts to change, or make it up to them for whatever they thought they did wrong. Sitting in the theater or on your comfy couch at home watching a movie scene like that will usually cause you to cringe with embarrassment for the poor man or woman that's on the screen pouring their heart out and humiliating themselves in the process. And you wonder if they are even aware of how much they are actually hindering their chances of getting back together with their ex.
Do you see yourself in that movie scenario? Are you doing any of these things that are not only pushing your ex away, but making you feel worse about yourself even though you think you are powerless to stop it? I'm sure you are thinking that it doesn't matter if your self esteem takes a beating, if you can just convince your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend of your love that you will win them back so you will do anything it takes, even move mountains to get them to understand how much you love and need them. You have to realize that you are building mountains between you and your ex instead. Or perhaps your thinking that you know that yours is a true love and true love conquers all! Well true love is the operative word, or perhaps the better term would be real love instead.
Real love isn't needy or desperate. It's confident enough to allow your ex to have the space they need right now to breath and get a handle on their emotions before you make your next move. And if you make your next move the right one you will greatly increase your chances of winning your ex back instead of continuing to push them away from you. Even if you think you've blundered things too much, don't despair, it's never too late! Now is the time to take that step back and give it a break.
Use this time wisely to pull yourself together and start learning a SMARTER WAY to get your ex back.
Hi, I'm Claire Tourney and I understand how you feel right now. If you would like to get back your self esteem and get your ex back too, learn more from my Squidoo lens Get Your Ex Back - The Smart Way!